Day eleven

Day eleven, July 19, 2011

Wow, I think I'm really beginning to understand writers block!  I'm stumped on how to begin this blog!  Maybe my nostalgia is getting in the way. =\. Only forty-eight  precious more hours with the Nomads and then back to reality.  

Anyway, after opening the blackout shades (thank you Vegas) we forced ourselves up to begin the adventures of the second full day in Sin City.  We began our trip by visiting the famous "Welcome to Las Vegas" sign.  It is located in a very odd area after all of the "new" Vegas had been built.  We attempted to have our picture taken all together but apparently Jeffrita thought we traveled all the way to Vegas to have only half of the sign in the background of our picture.  Again, poor job on our part choosing a photographer.  We decided that from there on out, the only people we'd even consider taking our picture must be holding a camera worth $600 or more.  None of this handheld or disposable crap.  Our photographer doesn't fool around so neither should any of the people who are blessed enough to capture such beauties.  Oh shush!  Everyone can be full of themselves sometimes, it's not my fault God put us to the top of his list.  ;-)

Next stop, the Gold and Silver Pawn Shop!  Pawn Stars ring a bell?  You betcha!  We wandered on over to the "old" Las Vegas to check out the location of one History Channel's top shows!  We actually went at the perfect time, Rick, the owner, was being interviewed by the local news right in the store!!  Unfortunately we couldn't get too close but we may have made the news!  The store had awesome antiques and present day artifacts as well.  There was an unopened album by the Beatles, Yesterday and Today, selling for two grand.  Even though that's pocket change to this baller, I decided to let someone else have a go around with it. :) Jen and I decided that the next trip we take to Vegas, we are going to bring our Barbie dolls with us and sell them to Gold and Silver and then go crazy in Vegas!  There were even trolls there! I couldn't believe that if we had kept the majority of our childhood toys, we could have made bank!  After Matt made his biggest purchase of the trip, a watch made by Omega, the official watch of James Bond, we were ready for some grub!

The Wynn's buffet was the most magnificent thing I've seen since sliced bread!  This place had the following stations: soup, salad, pizza, pasta, meat, sushi, seafood, vegetarian, cheese and spreads, Indian, asian, and last but not least, an entire room dedicated to desserts.  My mouth was watering as we patiently awaited for Jesus to take our beverage order.  Coincidence that his name was Jesus, I think not!  We think Grandma and Grandpa sent him to watch over us and make sure our stomachs didn't explode!  The Wynn did not know what was coming for them when the Amos family walked through their doors.  Between the four of us, we put a  good dent in each station.  We hung out for a little bit in order to settle our stomachs before tackling the remainder of the casinos and hotels we haven't yet seen.  Jen, Rob, and myself waited for Matt to return from the bathroom but we could no longer bare to wait after being crop dusted!  We choked our way out of there and weren't sure if an employee should be warned to evacuate the northeast dining room!  There is no way that smell would have been okay with the department of health.  No wonder why the bathrooms were so roomy and private!  I guess Jesus was so focused on our stomachs that he neglected to keep an eye on someone else's colon.

The roulette table was calling Jen's name so we went over with high hopes.  Hmm, maybe in Vegas you should always approach something with low hopes so whatever the outcome is you won't be crushed.  Jen was up and down for a while but finally it didn't end too well.  Damn Vegas, you did us all dirty!  As we were sitting there Rob mentioned a few times that he wanted to put $20 on one number.  Would you believe that twice he called the number but sat back and watched instead of playing?! Of course, the dumb ball thrower had to rub it in his face and tell him that he missed out on $700. No more gambling at the Wynn for us, apparently we don't "Wynn" anything!  Down the strip we went to see the elaborate decorations of each casino.  We finally made it to a place we like to call home, New York, New York.  We had been waiting all day for the only ride on the strip in Vegas...the roller coaster!!  Maxing out at 67 mph, and dropping as high as 180 feet, with two upside down loops we were ready to be tossed around! We waited a little bit longer than necessary in order to sit in the first and second cars.  Jen and I sat in the front, it was totally worth the wait.  I'm almost positive we screamed and laughed the entire time.  I was laughing so hard that I cried and smeared my makeup all over my face.  Included in the "Family Fun Package" were two 5x7 photos,  you better belive we got the action shots.  If you ever need a good laugh just ask to see the photos, they are priceless.  Re-ride for half the price?? H-e-double hockey sticks yeah!!  That was awesome, we couldn't pass up a second time around!  We hopped back on the line, screamed and laughed again and then booked it back to the car in order to make it to the hotel for a pita and hummus fix!  

On the ride home, we asked ourselves if it seemed reasonable to pay $88 to ride a roller coaster...  Unanimously we said no, but we're in Vegas, go big and hard or go home! To our dismay, crackers and cream cheese dip was the snack of happy hour.  Oh well, we figured we'd save room for dinner anyway.  After inquiring with a few places we decided on Capo's, an Italian restaurant located off the strip.  We thought it'd be a good idea because we'd save some money.  I plugged the destination into Delores, my GPS, and hoped she would cooperate.  As we pulled into the parking lot, it seemed a little deserted.  Being off the strip, we weren't too sure how safe the area was.  There were a few lights on, but as we inched closer, we saw that the windows were boarded up!  Susan, the front desk attendant, told me this place was an A+! You would think Susan would have known about this little riff in the road!  Matt got out to go check the sign on the door.  Thankfully the sign told us, they had relocated.  Ok, Susan, you have one more chance to redeem yourself.  A few miles up the road we spotted Capo's and to our advantage, there was a sign reading "2 for 1 Tuesdays!". Wow, Susan, you nailed it!! A+ for you, little lady!  

We pulled into the parking lot and were about to snag a primetime spot but realized it had "valet only" painted in front of it.  We opted for the spot across  the way.  Oddly, the entrance to this establishment was at the rear of the building...weird, but we went with it.  As we entered there was a murky feeling lurking around us.  The waiting room we walked into was painted red with pictures frames every which way you turned.  Straight ahead was a door with a hand written note requesting that we "Ring the bell to enter" and to the right was a pay phone.  What in the world is going on?!  First a boarded up restaurant with an address to the "new location", now a back door entrance way with a requirement to ring the door bell??  I was shaking in my boots and reluctantly pressed the door bell.  No one answered and we couldn't hear a thing!  I wondered out loud if we should call the restaurant again and find out what the deal is.  Suddenly, a voice begins to speak, "No, you don't have to call the man at the restaurant.  I am right here". Jen and I looked like we just saw a ghost, we had no idea where the voice is coming from.  I scanned the room, and jumped back as I made eye contact with a man looking through a small square in the upper right corner of the room.  Just as I went to step back from the door to allow him to open it, the pay phone swung open....I forgot that Susan told me it was an Italian SPEAK EASY! Ha!  That would have been a key aspect to remember.  

We walked into this old fashion speak easy with pictures of the mob everywhere, chalk outlines of dead bodies on the floor, and the Godfather playing on television.  As the manager sat us at our candle lit table he explained that if we do the 2 for 1, we just have to make sure whatever we order is under twenty dollars, with a two drink minimum.  Great, I think, we came on the perfect day!  Our server approached the table and took our drink order, we all ordered cocktails.  After she walked away, Jen commented that I threw her off ordering an alcoholic drink, and then the rest followed suit.  I don't know why they wouldn't have wanted to take advantage of 2 for 1 Tuesdays but whatevs, I guess they did now!  I wasbstill a little confused as to why there was a $20 maximum...maybe people order cheap bottles of wine on 2 for 1 Tuesday?  I quietly wondered to myself what kind of cocktails they mix here that could cost up to twenty dollars.  No time to wonder about that, I needed to focus on the menu!  As I was browsing the pasta dishes I vaguely heard Jen tell Matt that his meal must be under twenty dollars in order to get the 2 for 1 Tuesday deal.  I kept  looking over the menu but I was confused...why must you order a meal under twenty dollars in order to receive the 2 for 1 drink deal??  Doesn't matter, this didn't concern me at the time.  I kept hearing them bicker over it and finally interjected with, "I don't get it, wouldn't they want you to order expensive meals?". This is where g I slowly began to understand the concept of 2 for 1.  After laughing at me for a little bit, Jen explained that 2 for 1 is not in fact a drink deal but an entree deal!  Well then, that changes everything!  I was wondering why the manager told us that we could order soft drinks as well as cocktails.  When he mentioned that, I sort of just shrugged it off, why would you want to order a coke when drinks are two for one?!  Now I get it, entrees are 2 for 1 as long as they are under twenty dollars, and as long as two people order a minimum of two drinks.  Ok cool, glad that little mystery stirring in my head was solved.  Now, I was able to enjoy my meal without wandering off into a day dream, trying to figure out the 2 for 1 puzzle.  Our soups and salads arrived and everyone was almost done with their first cocktail so we all decided that we should order a "soft" drink to try to keep the bill down.  I don't really feel like a soda so I decide I just want a water.  Holy moly, I thought everyone was gonna blow a gasket.  Simultaneously everyone told  me "You have to order another drink!". Woah, what is going on? As long as at least two of them were ordering another drink it shouldn't  matter, right?!  "But guys, if at least two of you are getting a "soft drink" it doesn't  matter!  You only need to make sure two of us order at least two drinks.". Laughter erupted and once again, confusion washed over me.  "So, let me get this straight...2 for 1 entails, 2 entrees under twenty dollars for the price of one, and all persons must get at least two drinks, but they don't have to be alcoholic?". The chorus replied with a relieved "Yes!!". "So that's why you said I threw you off when I ordered a cocktail? Oh, this makes so much more sense now!".  Who would have thunk that two for one Tuesdays could be so confusing?!  I suggested a briefing on the way in for the next time.  

Finally we wrapped up the majority of our food to feast on later and got the bill.  Matt hands the young lady his credit card and less than a minute later she came  back with it and said it's declined.  He gave her another one and quizzically wondered why his card could possibly be declined, it's brand new?  "Matt, did you call the credit card company and ask to put a travel notice on your card?". "No. Why would I have to do that??". "Hahah no wonder why!  They definitely put a hold on your account after buying your watch.". "I don't get it, why would they do that?".  "Stolen card, identity theft...they aren't just going to assume you are on vacation in Vegas".  "I didn't have to call them when I went to Hawaii...or when I went to Florida a few years ago".  "Matt, when did you go to Florida?!". "Ok, well maybe I didn't go to Florida..". Like I've said , sometimes I wonder...

After we finally found  the exit of the restaurant, we walked outside to Bubble Cobalt and I realized the "valet" spot we wanted to park in earlier, was not a valet spot at all.  There was no valet station, no one collecting keys, it was just a joke, just as the spot marked "Mr Sarentino". Oh boy, Capo's you really threw us for a loop tonight!  The whole ride back to the strip we laughed at everything that occurred at dinner.  We hadn't  realized that was just a warm up for what was to come.  We started off the night walking the wrong way down the parking garage ramp, oops, that's how Jersey taught us to do it!  We watched the Ballagio water show and then finally made  it to Paris for an Eiffel tower filled with a Miami Vice (half Piña Colada, half Strawberry Daiquiri).  I had two coupons to receive $100 worth of free slot dollars at Casino Royale, so we made our way down the strip.  On the way, we stopped in at Harrah's to use the bathroom but were soon drawn in by the Dueling Pianos bar.  This time, the only drunk people were those in the audience.  While Jen, Rob and Matt were watching, I wandered across to a black jack table. Kris, my dealer, was flipping through those cards so quickly that sometimes he surprised me when he threw some more chips my way. Wow, I won?  Thanks Kris!  After a little while of playing, a guy dressed in a blue plaid shirt, slumped down in the chair next to me and tossed two dollar bills on the table and sat there silently.  The dealer and I looked at him as if he had three heads, but he doesn't even notice.  Finally, I leaned over and as I pointed at the minimum sign  I asked  "Hey buddy, can you see those numbers?". His response was a big smile and a shake of his head.  "So, you do realize that it's a ten dollar minimum, right?". Once again, big smile and a bob of the head.  "Soooo, you are probably going to need eight more dollars in order to play". This time, I only received a big smile.  The dealer called the pit boss over and the pit boss kindly explained that it may be in his best interest to go find some coffee and possibly take a little walk because he just didn't seem ready to play right then.  Blue plaid shirt grabbed his two dollars, stuffed  it in his pocket and stumbled away.  God speed man, God speed.  

After a few more hands my luck ran out and that was the end of my gambling in Vegas.  I returned to the group to watch the piano players, who were absolutely amazing, and what did I see but a guy in a blue plaid shirt dancing up on the stage by the pianos!! I did a double take, and yes, it was indeed him!!  I quickly told Jen what just occurred at the black jack table and the girl next to us overheard me and commented that "it would be okay if this was just the way he acts in Vegas, but he acts like this all the time". Little did I know, she saw Rob pointing him out earlier and asked if Rob was laughing at the guy in the blue, because he was with her.  Beth, that was her name, told us that this young man had gotten kicked out of three casinos.  Who knows, maybe he was going for a world record.  I turned my attention back to Mr. Plaid, I couldn't get enough of his fist pump.  It was a slow motion version of the Jersey fist pump, and for some reason, he liked to keep his free hand behind his back.  Maybe he was afraid to go too wild with two fists, or maybe it helped him keep his balance, he certainly needed help with that.  Whatever the case was, he was the sweetest character we had met the entire trip.  This kid could not get enough of the stage, he kept going back for more.  We asked Beth what Mr Plaid's name was, "David" she replied with.  Oh, David,we are so glad to have had the pleasure to meet such a lush like you.  During one of  David's trips up to the stage, the pianist told him that any of the audience members that were uninvited to the s
stage must drop their pants.  "Oh no, oh no!" shouts Beth.  "I can't look, tell me what happens.  Ohmygod, this is so embarrassing" Beth said as she turned around.  David whipped his belt open, but didn't get any further and continued with his version of the fist pump.   I then proceeded to tell the black jack story to Beth and before I could cover my eyes, she almost whipped her cannonball out to show me that she not only had his wallet, but his cell phone tucked into that baby.  Wow!  You would have never known, that bosom concealed those objects  better than an undercover cop conceals his weapon.  

While David wandered around, Jen filled me in on some other characters we had on our hands.  The first winner of the night was Blue Tank Top.  Apparently, this big boned girl had a few to many bevs this evening and was playing peek-a-boo with her stomach.  She began by only flowing her shirt out, then she lifted it a few inches higher....then Woo, woooo, WOOOOO! That shirt was up and over her mountains and she was putting on a show for all.  She, as well, had some pretty award winning dance moves that I was lucky enough to catch on video.  Another class act, black dress,  happened to be sitting right in front of where we were standing.  Maybe the two were related because this girl also felt the need to pop her girls out and reveal them to the girl she was sitting with.  This girl looked as if she were scarred for life. "I'm sorry, I just couldn't help myself" black dress giggled as she settled herself back down.  We didn't even need to go to a strip club, we had all the entertainment we needed right here at Harrah's.  Whilst Jen caught me up on our people watchees, Beth caught Matt's ear and informed him that David and her were just "hooking up",  he calls her a bitch all the time, he hates her mom, he enjoys getting drunk in her basement, and she was probably going to fool around with him later.  Woah now, that's certainly a lot of information to be sharing with a stranger.  By this time, David made it back out to the dance floor and was beckoning Beth to join him.  No, no, she waved him off!  Still with his belt hanging low, David rocked the one hand behind your back fist pump.  I can't believe I never got a video of him, I think I may have been concentrating on not urinating myself on account that I lost it every time I looked in David's direction.  As the pianists finished up and we began to collect our belongings, we lost sight of David.  Robert spied him approaching the craps table with the same two dollars he had at the black jack table.  Oh David, best wishes with this casino and whatever trouble you get yourself into this evening.  

It was a great ending to our trip to Vegas.  Although, I'm sure we all would have enjoyed some winnings but regardless, we had an amazing time.  Next stop: Cali, yo dude!  Peace, love, and happiness, The Nomads!